The American philosopher John Dewey stated: "A question well-phrased provides half the answer" .

As you embark on the Self-Awareness process and begin to observe yourself, asking and answering questions will help you focus and pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, attitude, reactions and behaviors and enable you to understand how they drive you to sabotage your relationships. It is quite likely that you haven't asked yourself these questions before.

To help you with the process, I list here sample-questions you can begin asking yourself. Add as many others as you go along. The more honest you are in answering them, the more insights you will gain and the ways in which you harm your relationships.

1. Questions about yourself

* How do I usually behave when having a relationship:

- Am I authentic?

- Am I open and honest with my partner(s), or closed and cautious, afraid of being hurt?

- Am I true to myself and behave in ways that feel right to me? Or do I tend to sacrifice myself "for the sake of the relationship"?

* Do I tend to get into relationships due to the fear of being alone? If so, does it drive me to enter a relationship with whoever asks me out?

* Do I feel there is something I would like to change about myself, but are afraid to, or don't know how? If so, what is this "something"?

* When problems and conflicts arise in my relationships, how do I cope with them:

- Am I aggressive, feeling that I am always "right"?

- Am I submissive?

- Am I too compromising?

* What, in my opinion, drives me to behave the way I do?

* Do I see myself as a person who "gives space" to my partner? If so, do I know whether it comes out of appreciation of his/her own space, out of an attitude regarding life and relationships, or out of my fear of commitment? (Each one of these might influence differently the ways in which you behave with your partner or with being single).

* Do I perceive myself as a person that never says NO? If so, is it because I am "accommodating", or because my need for love drives me to avoid being rejected in all costs? Or -

* Do I perceive myself as a person who always negate what my partner wants and says? If so, what drives me to doing so?

* Do I see myself as a person who has "much love" to offer and therefore desire (and demands!) much closeness? Or could it be that my behavior is driven by dependency and neediness?

* Do I see myself as a person who "loves so much" and therefore tend to do everything for my partner? Or could it be that my behavior is driven by the fear of being rejected and abandoned?

* Could it be that "loving so much" actually originates from me being a controlling person who need to decide about and be involved with everything related to my partner?

* Do I see myself as a person who perceive my way of "doing things" as always the right way?

* And other questions related to your own issues that you can you come up with.

As you see, there could be different reasons for the way you behave. When you become aware of your behaviors and identify where they originate from you can better understand how you sabotage your relationships.

2. Questions about your relationship failures

* Do you think that the way you handle yourself in relationships is fine, and not having a satisfying relationship until now results from not having met "the right person" yet?

* Is it possible that you have been hurt in past relationships and are now so cautious that you hinder your own attempts at developing a new bond?

* Would you be willing to consider the possibility that something in you - your thoughts, attitudes, feelings, reactions and behaviors - drive you to fail time and again (due to fears, needs, unfinished businesses and other factors that control you)?

* And other questions like these related to your own issues and relationship history.

3. Questions related to your thoughts, feelings, attitude, reactions and behaviors

* How do you usually feel about what your partner says or does (for example: always agree, always disagree, and so on)?

* Which thoughts usually go through your mind while you interact with your partner (such as: "Am I smart enough?"; "Do I make myself clear?"; "Does my partner appreciate me?" and so on).

* Can you tell what your reactions and behaviors say about what kind of a person you are (for example: aggressive; submissive; a victim; shy; introvert; extrovert; honest; stingy; secure; independent; dependent; cautious; open; and so on)?

* What is your attitude when approaching dating, relationships and the other sex (for example: positive; negative; suspicion; mistrust; hope; and so on)?

* Are you often satisfied with the ways in which you handle yourself with dates and relationships? If yes, how do you explain your failures?

* If you are not satisfied with the ways in which you handle yourself with dates and relationships:

- How do you explain that?

- How would you like to handle yourself?

- What do you think stands in your way from adapting these ways?

4. Questions about factors that control you

If you have answered the previous 3 sets of questions you may be ready for this fourth set. It calls for a higher level of Self-Awareness, and deals with uttermost important issues which cause you too sabotage your relationships.

* Can you identify any fears which drive your thoughts, feelings, attitude, reactions and behaviors (such as: the fear of being alone; the fear of commitment; the fear of being hurt; the fear of abandonment)? Which of these fears discouraged you from having a relationship, or controlled you when having one? Have any of these driven you to jump from one relationship to another?

* Can you identify any needs which exert power over your thoughts, feelings, attitudes, reactions and behaviors (such as: the need for independence, the need to receive constant love and approval, the need for control)?

* Can you identify any expectations and fantasies you hold on to about partners and relationships? Thinking these over, do you think they are realistic? Have they ever harmed your relationships when not being fulfilled, by causing frictions, arguments, disappointments?

* Can you identify the attitude you usually have about partners and relationships (and towards the other sex in general)? Can you realize how it is being expressed in your reactions and behaviors?

* Can you identify which thoughts, feelings, attitude, reactions and behaviors repeat themselves throughout all your interactions?

* Can you identify any other issues which are unique to you which affect your thoughts, feelings, attitude, reactions and behaviors and hurt you constantly?

Asking questions: Summary

Questions well-phrased enable you to observe yourself carefully and come up with answers which will give you insights into the ways in which you sabotage your relationships. By doing so you develop your Self-Awareness and become able to:

* See, understand and acknowledge your automatic patterns of thinking, feeling, reacting and behaving;

* See, understand and acknowledge the factors you haven't been aware of until now which control you and drive you to hang-on to these automatic patterns (such as fears and needs, unrealistic expectations and fantasies, messages you internalized);

* Realize the ways in which you have harmed your relationships.

* De-activate the power these factors have exerted over you;

* Become able to consciously choose to think, feel, react and behave otherwise; and

* Become empowered to develop and maintain a successful intimate relationship.

The questions listed above are intended to give you a "head start" as you begin to develop your Self-Awareness. The more you'll come up with questions related to your own relationships' issues and experiences, the more helpful insights you will gain about the ways in which you have harmed your relationships until now.

Doron Gil, Ph.D., is an expert on Self-Awareness and Relationships with a 30 year experience as a university teacher, workshop leader, counsellor and consultant. He is the author of more than 100 articles on the subject and of: "The Self-Awareness Guide to a Successful Intimate Relationship". Available as eBook and paperback: http://www.amazon.com/Self-Awareness-Guide-Successful-Intimate-Relationship/dp/143925141X/

More on Dr. Gil, his book and articles: http://self-awareness-and-relationships.blogspot.com

To get anyone you want, you have to think about one thing: Trust in relationships and how it affects you. Some people think gaining trust in relationships is hard, but it can't be further from the truth. In this article I will answer the most frequently asked questions about how to win back anyone by having trust in relationships.

How can I win anyone back? By taking five simple steps that includes admitting your mistakes, by showing how much you have grown, by being patient, by giving the person you want to attract more space and by showing independence. If you can do these five steps, then you know how to gain trust in relationships and win anyone back.

So how do I apply these five steps? By taking action! You can do these five steps in various ways, but there are a few things to watch out for.

What things do I have to watch out for? There is always an extreme to both ends, you can be too patient for example or give too much space, neither of which is any good.

So what is the best way of going about this? Make a list with these five steps. You start first with admitting mistakes. It's not enough simply to say you have done mistakes though, you need to identify what they are. Write down your main point which in this case is admitting your mistakes. Then write several sub points underneath it. It can be you feel you are too clingy, or maybe you are easily persuaded by the people around you etc. It doesn't matter how big or small the points are, anything and everything is relevant. Getting back trust in relationships is not easy, so be thorough.

Ok, I got my list. What now? Now you look through them and make notes on what you can do to take them off your list. Now for the most important part. Once you have a few suggestions what you do,

TAKE ACTION! This is the most important part of this whole exercise if your goal is to really get back trust in your relationships. If you spend too long time thinking about it and not taking action, you might lose that person you want forever, so take action today. Here's your action plan. Make a list over the 5 points which I mentioned earlier. They are admitting mistakes, show growth, being patient, giving space and being independent.

TAKE ACTION NOW if you want any sort of trust in relationships now and in the future.

http://thelovegeek.com is about love and how to find and keep it. The Love Geek is a resource started by author Jorn Tillnes. Relationships are not easy, but you may want to go to Find True Love to get some answers.

Did you know that you can use the Internet to find your true love? It is true, and more and more people use the net to find Companion. This can be your reality to be, if you know what online tell a potential partner. If you over, if it is really true love, this article may be a little concerned some help for you.

There are to consider some things, if to think whether you talk the person be a good partner for you. One thing you need to consider is the amount of time that you know this person. If you not yet it has long been known, should not then maybe rush things and should allow the mature relationship and develop in the course of time. If you for a good while but known have, it may be in your best interest, meet two out of each other with this person - no matter how far you live.

Here are more things you need to consider before an online dating relationship start.

(1) Attracted to will to her?

Whether you believe it or not, many long distance calls, because only the last attraction not long relationship at the end. You want to ensure that still burns the fire between you two and you find interesting is still their. Nothing ends a relationship faster than not someone - is attracted, so is this something that you will want to think about your feelings for the woman, who you with. Here is another thing to consider.

2 Talk much?

Do you speak much with this particular woman? If you talk to guys, what you're talking about. Is it all sweet talk and no general question? If Yes, you should know then that this is boring after a while and you need something else to talk about. If it will talk all General, then this is a good sign, because it shows that you can talk about two of everything and always still happy with each other. Here is another thing to consider.

(3) She like you?

In assessing this question you need to be honest with himself. Do you really think that she likes you? You need to examine this question, because you don't have to try doing things to the next level with a woman, who feel not the same way about you, how you over it.

You're relationship is far off, here are some things to think before the test meeting with her:

-Anrufen has it every day?
Long are-Dauern your conversations?
-Feststellen her, how much she is missing you?

If you have answered all these questions with "Yes", then you more than likely have a woman on your team that you like. They would like these questions to store the fix your relationship to the next level to take and they will not. That is why is a handle on your situation as an idea always advisable.

Take these questions and use them to determine whether on the next stage of your online dating relationship should take.

Good luck with your online dating relationship.

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To get anyone you want, you have to think about one thing: Trust in relationships and how it affects you. Some people think gaining trust in relationships is hard, but it can't be further from the truth. In this article I will answer the most frequently asked questions about how to win back anyone by having trust in relationships.

How can I win anyone back? By taking five simple steps that includes admitting your mistakes, by showing how much you have grown, by being patient, by giving the person you want to attract more space and by showing independence. If you can do these five steps, then you know how to gain trust in relationships and win anyone back.

So how do I apply these five steps? By taking action! You can do these five steps in various ways, but there are a few things to watch out for.

What things do I have to watch out for? There is always an extreme to both ends, you can be too patient for example or give too much space, neither of which is any good.

So what is the best way of going about this? Make a list with these five steps. You start first with admitting mistakes. It's not enough simply to say you have done mistakes though, you need to identify what they are. Write down your main point which in this case is admitting your mistakes. Then write several sub points underneath it. It can be you feel you are too clingy, or maybe you are easily persuaded by the people around you etc. It doesn't matter how big or small the points are, anything and everything is relevant. Getting back trust in relationships is not easy, so be thorough.

Ok, I got my list. What now? Now you look through them and make notes on what you can do to take them off your list. Now for the most important part. Once you have a few suggestions what you do,

TAKE ACTION! This is the most important part of this whole exercise if your goal is to really get back trust in your relationships. If you spend too long time thinking about it and not taking action, you might lose that person you want forever, so take action today. Here's your action plan. Make a list over the 5 points which I mentioned earlier. They are admitting mistakes, show growth, being patient, giving space and being independent.

TAKE ACTION NOW if you want any sort of trust in relationships now and in the future.

http://thelovegeek.com is about love and how to find and keep it. The Love Geek is a resource started by author Jorn Tillnes. Relationships are not easy, but you may want to go to Find True Love to get some answers.

The goal of most dating is always to discover whether or not the both of you are suitable for each other, ideally, so compatible that you want to spend the rest of your lives together. Failure to ask great questions, questions that you really require answers to, can end up creating a lot of long-lasting pain for all people that are involved.

A counselor will want to know if the attraction between both parties is really shared?

You will find a belief in groups of males and females that particular individuals of the opposite sex are so appealing - "he's a catch - she's a babe," that this concern of mutual attraction is largely pushed aside.

Let's assume for a minute that Tony really is drawn to Brittany. He is told by a lot of buddies that he would be "lucky" to end up together with a gal like her. Tony pursues her and is able to win her over. Now, Brittany is impressed by the attention she obtains from Tony. She feels special, although she finds that there is numerous things pertaining to Tony she does not understand or even like. She ignores many of these emotions since she actually is concerned that no other man could desire her like he truly does.

It's now quite a few years into their union and it is no secret to Tony that Brittany is just not very attracted to him. He feels hurt, frustrated and angry, and their bond suffers as a consequence.

Is the attraction between the two people mutual over a prolonged stretch of time?

It's recognized that 85 to 90 % of the things we participate in every day are governed by our subconscious thoughts. These are definitely our habitual behaviours, some which have been with us for decades. The remaining 10 to 15% of the activities are accomplished by our conscious mind. We try to make conscious choices about what will eat for supper, how to react to a whining customer, or what to dress in for work.

Early in the dating process we are more conscious or diligent about our clothing and etiquette, due to the fact we want to make a very good impression. After a while, as the relationship gets to be more long lasting, men and women often ease off consciously trying to impress the other person and their conditioned morals and behaviors that govern eighty-five to ninety percent of their day by day actions are more apparent to the other person.

For this reason, folks who date and commit too quickly, years later, find themselves thinking about their partner and pondering... "who are you?" You're most definitely not the person I recall falling head over heels in love with!

The particular individual they fell in love with was consciously acting in a certain manner. The person they find themselves now with is the same, except that they're living from what his or her own subconscious mind has kept and referenced for super quick playback.

Chris Keenan is the founder of Easy Relationship Help. They provide a low cost alternative to traditional marriage-counselling. Their risk free method to relationship assistance makes it simple for individuals to obtain the counseling support they want. "Why be all alone when you don't have to?"