I thought it was going to be just another Easter evening alone on March 31, 2013. When there's nothing too exciting going on in my life I always turn to online social media. This time I chose Facebook to keep me company. I was very happy I did. The results were astonishing.

Not very often, but sometimes, I would look up an old flame online. This time my thoughts were on my first love. Her name is Susan. We spent five years of our teen years through the first two years of my 20s. We met when Susan was 15 and I was 17. Five years is a very long time together during those impressionable, adolescent years. She was in ninth grade in junior high and I was a junior in high school.

Through the years we had lots of innocent fun but it was like a game of cat and mouse when it came to Susan's parents and the two of us. They did not approve of my age and my appearance. I had long hair. And one year and nine months made such a difference in our age according to her parents. We both had to sneak around to see each other. I cut my hair but that didn't help.

Me and Susan were very mature and responsible for our age. We waited to have sex for three years. By then she was on birth control pills and she was eighteen. If only her parents knew how responsible we were, but that wasn't the case. We heard of a couple friends of Susan's that became pregnant and we did not want that type of responsibility too soon. I was unable to win over Susan's father but I did with her mother as time passed. We were just kids having fun. We went to concerts, movies, and just hung out in parks and drove to the mountain and the ocean. We occasionally went to parties, drank beer and smoked weed. We meant no harm.

I finally found a decent job after dating Susan for three years. It was a civil service job working for the U.S. Department of Defense at the Puget Sound Naval Shipyard in Bremerton, about 28 miles from our hometown in Tacoma. I moved out of my parent's home and moved closer to work. I was on my own for the first time. We now had to alternate weekends to see each other. I would drive to Tacoma and spend the weekend with my parents to see Susan. And Susan would spend the weekend with me the next weekend at my apartment when her dad was away working for two weeks on and two weeks off. He made a living in the tugboat industry as a captain of a crew. Susan's mother was much more liberal than her father. She would allow Susan to visit me for the weekend. It never got back to her father.

In 1973 Susan graduated from high school and later that year she attended a vocational school where she studied daycare. It was 1974 when me and Susan were engaged to get married. I was working at my job for only one year and Susan had graduated from vocational school and began her job in a daycare pre-school. We set a wedding date for May 24, 1975. We were just as happy as the day we met and now we were looking forward to spending our lives together and start a family.

In the summer of 1974 I developed a habit of drinking alcohol too much and too often. It began to effect my attendance at work. By the time Susan recognized my problem I was pretty much an alcoholic. It began to spiral out of control. I was in denial when Susan approached me about it. But I kept drinking excessively. We were involved in a car accident that could have easily taken our lives and maybe others. Afterwards I kept promising to Susan that I would quit but I never did. She believed I could quit drinking but deep inside I knew I wouldn't. I never believed I was an alcoholic.

The following year our wedding day was approaching in less than a week and I was extremely nervous. I was beginning to feel frightened at the thought of being married. My anxiety was flying high. I think Susan was, too. But she was frightened at the thought of beginning a marriage with my problems that seemed to compound.

We had grown apart after being together for five years. We had grown up from being kids to adulthood and all the responsibilities that came with it. We were both unhappy.

Five days before our wedding was to take place I went on a drinking binge. And that did it for me. Susan told me we were finished. The wedding was called off.

My life became a living hell after Susan left. I couldn't imagine this was happening. I kept drinking and partying and getting into trouble with the law. About two months later my oldest brother, Donald, committed suicide. He was extremely depressed from a broken marriage and alcoholism. He was only 36. I happen to find him as I was making my weekend rounds. This profoundly changed my life for the worst. Two years later I resigned from my job before I was fired. I began to pile up DUI after DUI. The courts made me go into rehab for a three week intensive inpatient program. Afterwards I quit drinking for three weeks and then I continued on a roller coaster of heavy drinking, and drunken driving arrests, and jail sentences, losing my driving privilege for five years, a couple suicide attempts, a volunteer commitment to a mental ward, more car accidents, and numerous relationship breakups. Life was pure hell for many, many years.

In 2003, I was fifty years old. I had lost my wife to cancer in 2001. I had been a mess for almost 30 years. There was no doubt I was a raving alcoholic in its final stages. If I didn't stop drinking it was going to kill me for sure. I was determined to quit drinking at last. And now it has worked for over eleven years. I have not had a drink in that long and I finally made myself proud of being a grateful alcoholic.

Two years into my recovery, my other older brother, Mark, died of cirrhosis of the liver from a lifetime of drinking. He was 55. That could have been me. The death of my two brothers made me even stronger. I was maintaining my sobriety one day at a time and it was working. I had a new lease on life. I began to write a book one year after my brother, Mark, died in 2005. It took me four years to complete. One year I never wrote anything. The memories were too painful to relive. Reading about myself and my endless problems eventually gave me writer's block. And I was blocking out my life. I didn't want to read my own book. I finally published it in 2010. It was finished and I was happy it was. It was very good therapy for me to go through the pain and make amends to people I hurt.

I had written a big part of my book about my long relationship with Susan and how lost I felt to lose her. Susan's name in the book was fictionalized. I named her Rene. My main subject in my book was my battle with alcoholism, drugs, depression, suicide and grief.

On Easter evening, March 31, 2013, I was thinking about Susan and how I could get a hold of her. I have tried so many times to no avail. I attempted to contact her through Facebook, a popular online social media site. In the past I had tried Classmates and I also tried Google many times. I became ecstatic when her name and picture came up on my computer screen. So I put in a friend request to see if she would respond.

Two days passed by and no response. I knew it would be a very slim chance that she would respond and invite me onto her site, let alone her life. A couple days passed and I checked my e-mail and Facebook reminded me that I had a response. I opened it and it was from Susan indicating that she accepted my friendship request. I felt elated and 38 years lighter. This was the best news I heard in so many years. I didn't know how to respond. I didn't have a plan of action and no easy words of response came to mind. I finally gained my composure. I had no idea where this was going and there was no turning back except 38 years of catching up. I asked myself where I would start. Then I thought where would she start. It wasn't easy. If we should meet again how would we plan such a reunion, I asked myself. We were much older now. I was 60 and Susan was 58. We weren't exactly kids anymore--that's for sure.

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

The first response was up to me since I made the inquiry on Facebook. I e-mailed Susan first. I was so surprised that it wasn't that difficult to chat with her though it was an electronic conversation. She was easy to chat with and my words seem to flow flawlessly without any noticeable anxiety. Our message chats became very long and full of surprises.

I knew Susan married in 1978. I saved the engagement notice as I saved ours, too, back in 1975. She had a happy marriage lasting 23 years. She divorced in 2000. She had two children from her only marriage-a son and a daughter. They are both adults now. She lost her middle sister from breast cancer. Her mother passed away a few years later. Her dad was still living in his 90s in the same house they ever knew. And Susan was living just a couple miles from where we spent our final days together in the Purdy-Wauna area of Gig Harbor, Washington. I moved from that area to Tacoma about one year after we broke up. There were so many coincidences in our lives. But the most unusual fact was that we only bumped into each other only once in 1978 for one not-so-shining moment. We were cordial only for a couple minutes and we were gone. After that our lives were wiped clean as an eraser.

Almost three weeks passed by before a physical meeting would take place. We came up with an idea that we would meet on the first day the temperature outside would reach 70 degrees because we met in 1970. It seemed it took a long time before that would happen.We became tired of the wait and April 17 was approaching, the date we met in 1970. We were playing a cute little game. Then we gave in and scheduled a meet on April 17, 2013.

We thought it appropriate to meet on our anniversary that we originally met. Ironically, the weather was sunny and 70 degrees for the first time of the year. If I recall it may have been one or two degrees shy of 70. It was like all the stars were lined up for our reunion. It was unbelievable.

We met at Shenanigan's Restaurant on the waterfront in Tacoma, Washington. I was very nervous but settled down in time. Susan appeared a little anxious but not at all like me. Our meeting wasn't as difficult as I anticipated. This was the first time we actually spoke to each other in 38 years. We did talk on our cell phones prior to arriving at the restaurant.

I presented her a copy of my book I had written. Susan was so surprised I mentioned her in my book. I never wrote badly about her because there was nothing bad to write. I told the truth and how I became a loser and that I never blamed her for leaving me. She was so happy and excited to receive my book. I was touched.

We both ordered a shrimp salad for lunch and the waiter took our picture. We stayed for over an hour and agreed to meet at my place to introduce her to my life. We looked at our old pictures and she read back all the letters she wrote to me. The letters I wrote to her were somehow lost. Then later we drove to her place to continue our very special day. She confessed to me that it took her a couple days to check up on me over the internet. She visited my website, and she read that I quit drinking in 2003 and that I changed from my wilder days 38 years ago. I thought maybe she would either not respond to my Facebook friend request or she had to do some checking on this once-upon-a-time wild dude of the 70s. I was happy she did.

Our friendship was taking off in a positive direction. We had a good feeling how things were going. We were talking regularly on the phone for sometimes three hours at a time. We were happy just to be good friends and nothing more. When summer arrived we became best friends forever. We did things we used to when we were teenagers in love.

After I recovered from back surgery we drove down to the Oregon Coast and settled for three days at Yachats, a quiet and sleepy seaside resort. The Oregon Coast was to be our honeymoon spot back in 1975. Then later that summer we attended two rock concerts in July at Safeco Field in Seattle seeing Paul McCartney and in September we saw the Eagles at Key Arena, also in Seattle. In October we saw the Moody Blues at the Paramount Theater in Seattle. These performers were some of the ones we used to admire way back when we were one.

When winter settled in we would occasionally visit each other at our homes. We exchanged gifts at holidays and birthdays. Life was good once again. Susan always had a way of making me smile, laugh, and forgetting about things that bothered me. Our friendship really took off but we both knew we liked our relationship the way it is today-carefree without stress or complications. This was both our choice of independent living enabling us to seal our friendship forever. If it was anything more serious it might fade and wither away in time. Besides we were dating other people. We still have so much in common it's unbelievable. The only difference is that I was facing life and our relationship sober. And that was a very good thing.

The following year we celebrated our first anniversary on a sunny afternoon on April 17, 2014 at another waterfront restaurant in Tacoma. And once again we had our hostess take our picture. We swore that we would do this every year possible from now on.

In July we attended a Steely Dan concert at Mary Moore Park in Redmond, Washington. Also in July we made a road trip to Bend, Oregon, and we stayed for three days. It felt good to relax and hangout at the motel pool. We attended a concert starring Ringo Starr & His All Starr Band at the Les Schwab Amphitheater on the Deschutes River in Bend. We had great seats three rows back. And we had a great time. In August we saw the Eagles at the Tacoma Dome. In September we attended two concerts featuring Creedence Clearwater Revisited and America at the Tulalip Amphitheater in Marysville, Washington. Also in September we saw Crosby, Stills & Nash at the Chateau Ste. Michelle Winery in Woodinville, Washington. In October, we have planned to attend the Bob Dylan concert at the Paramount Theater in Seattle, and another concert in November to see the Fleetwood Mac at the Tacoma Dome. Together we attended seven concerts in 2014.

Susan and me decided we would name our reunion since the entire world knew we were hanging out together again. At least that was our fantasy. We came up with the name, Earl & Susan's Heart of the Matter Reunion Tour. Susan came up with an idea making a custom t-shirt like rock bands do. We thought of emblazing our reunion tour on the front of the shirt and on the back have the names, dates, and places where we been and the ten concerts we saw in 2013-2014. We thought this to be a tribute to our awesome reunion and friendship that will continue forever.

Good things and treasures have visited my life of sobriety. And the one thing that has been a true blessing is the friendship we have begun again-after 38 silent years. I will always remember these days as long as I have my memory. We have so many places to see, people to meet, and numerous concerts to attend. Thank you, Susan, for your friendship. It has truly been my pleasure.

Earl D. Erickson is a one-time author. His interests are to continue writing books and writing articles on the internet. In 2010, he wrote and published his first book,The Journey of an Incorrigible Alcoholic: The Paths I Chose and the Ones I Didn't.It was a very special memoir about his struggles with alcoholism, drug addiction, depression, anger, suicide, grief, and broken relationships.

Mr. Erickson, owns and manages his website at: http://www.SerenityLighthouse.com. His book can be purchased on his website, or his publisher's website at iUniverse.com, Amazon, Barnes & Nobel, and other retail bookstores online.

The most significant event that has happened in Mr. Erickson's life since he wrote this book is the reunion and close relationship of his first love, Susan, also portrayed in his book as the fictionalized name, Renee. His recovery and abstinence of alcohol, online social media, and Susan's forgiveness of his past made his life complete and happier. Mr. Erickson claims that all the stars were lined up to make all this happen. Today they both claim to be best friends forever. He insists this makes his book a happy ending to a sad story.

Mr. Erickson hobbies include writing, reading, photography, music, gardening, travel, and the great outdoors. He is a native and lifelong resident of Tacoma, Washington.

1. Commence with the commitment to make the marriage work.

2. Realize that you deceived each other in the courtship process and practice the skill of forgiving. While you were courting, you always put your best foot forward in order to accomplish your objective: marriage to the one you were courting. For this reason, you probably agreed to almost everything. Fortunately, you can overcome the problems that arise when you reveal those deceptions with a strong commitment and by recognizing that you not only want the marriage to work but also want to nurture it.

3. Endeavor at verbalizing your true feelings without taking punitive action against your mate. Say that you and your spouse swap cars, and when you switch back, you find that your mate has returned your car with the gas tank almost empty. Punitive action would be returning your mate's car with an empty tank the next time in order to get even. Instead, pleasantly say to your mate, "Honey, you may have noticed that when I use your car, I return it at least half full of gasoline. I would really appreciate it if you would show me the same courtesy." Chances are superb that if you handle the situation gently, lovingly, and with a big hug and smile, your mate will love you for it.

4. Build the skill of courteousness. Building the skill of courteousness is good advice for husbands and wives to follow. Discourtesy is really disrespect; you're seldom discourteous to anyone you truly respect. Marriage counselors say that one thing lacking in many poor marriages is genuine respect for each other. In marriage, we are often more discourteous than we are in friendships or in business relationships. Venting your anger in marriage and thinking that doing so costs nothing is irresponsible. Hurt relations always cost, especially in intimate relationships.

5. Junkthe words always and never from your vocabulary - as in "you always do this" or "you never do that." Those statements aren't true, and they can elicit nothing but a defensive retort from your life partner.

6. Work at looking for the good in your mate and work on finding the humor in problems. Many couples report that, in the midst of a heated argument, something hilarious happens or is said, perhaps an interruption by a child or an innocent but appropriate remark that hits the funny bone. At any rate, the anger immediately dissipates and laughter sets in - not at each other but with each other.

7. Keep in mind that your mate is not a mind reader. Many couples expect each other to know that they really don't enjoy being kidded about their expanding waistline, their receding hairline, their inability to wake up instantly, their dislike of sloppiness, or their need for support and encouragement about a specific thing. But you need to gently tell your mate what your needs are. He or she can't read your mind. Resentment builds within you if your mate doesn't meet a need or conducts himself or herself in a way that displeases you, but he or she may not have a clue as quandary bestting you.

Joey Plazo is passionate about executive coaching and attracting women to the world of NLP. He aids folks find obs in the Philippines .

What makes a loving relationship? Lots and lots of things, all based around a central theme of love, respect and friendship. There is no great secret as to what makes a loving relationship, just a willingness to work at the relationship day after day, in good times and bad. You cannot really call it work can you? Doing your best to look after and make happy the love of your life.

Couples who are in a loving relationship will give of themselves without expecting any reward, they instinctively know what the other needs and will help and support their partners without a second thought. They are able to do this because apart from the fact that they want to, they have taken the time to learn what their partner needs from the relationship and they are happy to help them achieve it. However to reach this kind of nirvana you have to be prepared to make yourself vulnerable.

You need to know and understand your partner and they need to know you. If you do not know your partner how can you help them to grow within the relationship, how can they help you? You need to be completely open and honest with each other, this will mean letting each other into areas where you could be vulnerable but it will bring you much closer together. If you hold back from your partner the you are automatically throwing up walls and to a degree pushing your partner away. You need to ask yourselves, what kind of relationship can you have if your partner only knows a part of you.

It is true that opposites attract and I am sure that there are opposites who have gone on to build very successful relationships. What will help you is if you like your partner, if your partner is your best friend, if you have shared interests. If all goes well you could be together for decades, it is a long time to be with someone if you do not like them.

One of the great pillars of a loving relationship is communication, which is hardly surprising when you look at how many aspects of the relationship are affected by communication. Communication pulls you together, it helps you to share thoughts, ideas, emotion and new experiences. It all helps to enrich your relationship.

In addition to talking with each other, you need to be able to spend quality time together when it is just the two of you. This will be a lot easier at first but as time passes on there will be work commitments, kids and a host of other things that life will throw at you. It is far to easy to forget that the important thing in the relationship is you two, nothing else matters as much, so you need that time together or else you will drift apart. Go on dates, vacations, walks, movies, it does not matter what you do, the important thing is that you get some you time where you take pleasure in each others company, bring yourselves closer together and dare I say it... You might even enjoy yourselves. I am sure that you enjoyed dating when you started building your relationship, there is no reason why you should stop enjoying yourselves!

Do not forget to give yourselves some me time. You are going to have your own friends and interests and you need time to devote to them. It will help you to unwind, give you something to talk about and bring fresh ideas and experiences to the relationship.

So what makes a loving relationship? You do. Comfort and support your partner, offer your energy without expecting anything in return. Just as you made a commitment to be with your partner are you consistent in your love for them. You do not get to choose the good bits or the bad bits in a relationship, you will face some rocky times but if you have a strong, healthy loving relationship you will find a way through and you will do it together. Keep a hold of your individuality, it is what makes you, it is who you are. Accept who your partner is, after all they have something which drew you to them so do not lose it by trying to change your relationship into some kind of sterile ideal. Focus on the positives and not the negatives and take pleasure in sharing your partners life.

Being a student of life I thought it about time to get my ideas down in the hope that they will help people with whatever difficulties they are facing. If you want to read further into the mysteries of understanding the opposite sex and relationships then my site might be of interest to you. Whatever your situation I wish you luck.
http://www.reviewthemagicofmakingup.com

You are love your new single life after divorce or a great break up? Can be all too happy to date? Find out why you to blissed out as a dating could be relationship and how you can change that.

While in New York for the national advertising Summit did in April, I met a real date with a virtual date I had through an online dating site for graduates of the Ivy League. I am glad to report that it was at first glance.

Each of us beamed a smile at the moment that our virtual connection was real. We had to know only one hour, because I had a ticket to a Broadway play that evening. So we talked quickly. Sparks flew, until he dropped a bomb.

He said "my life is great, and I can not imagine, everyone is happier with someone else,".

I felt slamming the door on our dating opportunities. Was this a new vertröstet technique? He had relationship enthusiasm by his ex-wife or girlfriends since his divorce drains have been? Didn't he know that shared joy is doubled and shared sorrow is halved? Or was he room relationship really well liked in his successful life as a dating?

I don't have time to explore these issues with him. As I hopped to in the u-Bahn, the theater on time, article I but on a current NEWSWEEK on luck.

Studies show that happier people, better on almost every dimension of well-being-health, wealth, relationships, a contribution to the community-as do less fortunate people. But the happiest people are not the largest bravado. This is called due to a complicated phenomenon of "Adaptation".

Here is my simple spin adjustment in connection with our community of singles:

If your single life is endless satisfied and happy, you have no motivation to change.

Somewhat less fortunate people remain under tension, but are hungrier and more driven to achieve, and to meet the unmet needs as a very happy people.

Happy people tend to create happy relationships. But what is if you feel too happy is a desire to reach and love again? Hanging out with unhappy friends or spend time in a Blues Club only could that change!

And if you or your single friends are looking for great love, let America's dear leader, Hadley Finch, help your soul mate in the dating site select, created exclusively for positive singles, the to the great love believe. Take you a free look around as her guest at https://www2.Nord.com.TribeOfSingles.com

You stop dead end dating and find true love now as Hadley Finch shows 7 ways to find and positive people, date, love, and marry. Request your free eBook now http://www .IFindLoveFast.com

If you are dating after divorce and feeling disappointed by a series of dead-end dates, you may be making this big dating mistake that stops you from loving again. I'd like you to understand the big dating mistake that I unwittingly repeated for a couple years after my long marriage ended in divorce so that you can avoid it.

What was my big dating mistake after divorce?

I was eager to duplicate my intimate connection, style of communication and roles that I played in my marriage with a new intimate partner.

Why?

This was the only relationship that I'd known in my adult life. I had learned about love as a wife and mother. I hadn't dated much before I met and married my former husband. So I knew how to love, not how to date. This was my comfort zone, and I had no idea that I had to break out of it if I wanted to love again.

How did I break out of my comfort zone?

- I learned how to date.

- I traded my mom clothes for still hot mama clothes when I went out on a date.

- I joined a matchmaking service that introduced me to a creative or professional date once a week over lunch.

- I learned how to use the internet so that I could join an online dating site -- after my 13 year old daughter encouraged me to do so when she gave me the film, "You've Got Mail."

- Since my only travel adventures had been with my husband and eventually with our children, I traveled solo to two continents to show myself that I could do this -- with unexpected dating advice from my teenage children.

- I let go of unrealistic love tests that I presented on dates, like waiting for love at first sight like I'd felt when I met my former husband.

- I stopped seeking The One and started creating friendships with great single men I met on 3 continents.

- I recovered from a mysterious injury that nearly destroyed my hope of loving again.

- I revived my career dreams and took action on them every day, and I was delighted by the album of songs, novel, podcast show and singles club that grew out of my break up and rebirth.

- I realized that I was too busy to nurture a romantic relationship while I dedicated myself to launching my kids and fulfilling my career goals.

- I gave myself a chance to grow into the new woman I was becoming before I entered a new relationship.

- I regained balance in my personal and professional life, so that I have freedom to focus on a new relationship.

- I let go of a desire to duplicate the intimacy or roles that I once played in my marriage, so that I finally feel free to love again.

I hope this helps you enjoy dating after divorce. When you focus on becoming your best you after divorce and before you enter a serious dating relationship, you will attract a love match who appreciates the new you as you develop a new vision for a happy relationship.

And if you're single and seeking to meet your great love, I invite you to enjoy a free month membership in the Singles Club Of Tribe Of Blondes. Not a hair color, it's a resilient, optimistic spirit that unites us and fuels our passionate choices and personal triumphs.

The Singles Club was created by author, Hadley Finch--a real-life Carrie Bradshaw who writes about love and relationships. Hadley's articles, podcasts, songs and novel, TRIBE OF BLONDES, are inspired by her online dating adventures in 3 continents and 200 blind dates after her long marriage ended in divorce.

Hadley makes sure that singles never have to go on another blind date again, since they meet through video chats, special events and travel vacations in the Singles Club. Claim your free, 30-day trial membership when you visit http://www.tribeofblondes.com and click on SINGLES CLUB. Enjoy!

When it comes to women and relationships, in the beginning, most men think they want to "Have their cake, and eat it too".

No need to explain what I mean by this, because I'm sure you intuitively get what I'm talking about, and you may have experienced this with a man.

But... This is not the case with every single man that a woman meets.

Every once in awhile, a man will meet a woman and know very quickly - without a doubt - that he wants to be with her and only her. I'm talking about the situation where a man knows he wants to be with one woman because it feels right on a deep emotional level.

When this happens, the man will usually be the one to push for a long-term commitment.

And you won't have to do anything but keep being the great partner that you are, and help him with the things he wants to do, to keep you both close and together.

Sometimes though for some strange reason, the guys you don't want seem to always be pursuing you for more.

Maybe this has happened to you before... But you don't exactly know how or why it happened... Or more importantly, how to repeat it with a guy you really want...

Strange how that works, isn't it?

Your goal is getting a guy that you want, to want to be more and more committed with you!

A woman that truly captures a man's heart will:

Make a man feel, through experience, that he's better off being with you rather than being single, spending most of his time with his friends, or "sleeping around".

And...

Show a man, on a physical and emotional level, that he's better off being with you rather than any other woman he could possibly meet.

Probably not your favorite thing to hear, but most men are "designed" by nature to be able to sleep with a lot of women. Men have a "drive" that's part of their long time role in nature.

Of course, this is not the way most women were designed...

In order for you to make a man feel that he is better off being with you rather than living the "single life" and going around and sleeping with a lot of women... Or focusing obsessively on his career. You need to remind him of the benefits that a deep, connected, loving relationship brings... And unlock those hidden feelings inside of him.

Fortunately it's easy to do - especially when he already has feelings of attraction for you. You can turn those feelings of attraction into feelings of intimacy and passion.

So few women know how to help a man get in touch with this side of himself - the part of himself that all men secretly long to share - when you are the one that helps him to do it, he will automatically start experiencing a deep connection with you and want to keep it alive and growing.

This is not something you can do just by talking about it. The key is to actually get him to experience those feelings when he's around you.

The reality here is that a guy will not willfully commit to you unless you flip this "switch". And no amount of pleading, begging, withholding, etc. Will work.

When you do flip this switch and trigger these thoughts... He will be the one asking you to commit... Every time.

If a relationship isn't growing, it's usually dying... And perhaps the most important thing you need to know is to continue to strengthen the bond between you and your man,... Keep that fire of intimacy burning forever.

Every one of us dreams of one day experiencing that "storybook" romance with that special person we are meant to share our lives with...

We think about how wonderful it will feel to finally be with that person... Look into their eyes... And know that we've found the love and connection we've been searching for.

For further, more in depth information and tips on this subject, please visit the link below...

[http://datinghelp101.info/]

I am sure you will agree that the information provided at the link above is very enlightening!

Thanks, Ken

We have all heard the idea of loving ourselves first in order to love and be loved by another. Yet how many of us are truly engaged in the practice of being loving and kind to ourselves? Being completely loving and kind to ourselves no matter what, being committed to tend to and to express our own needs and desires and show up for ourselves is the foundation required to draw in love and relationship.

Here's what so many of us do:

We beat ourselves up constantly
We tell ourselves the worst stories
We tell ourselves what we should have done differently, how someone else would have done it better, how there must be something wrong with us, how if only we were prettier, fitter, more lovable, a good person or were different to who we are in some way, all would be well
We criticize ourselves
We compare ourselves to others
We put all of our focus on our flaws and imperfections
We put huge pressure and expectation on ourselves to be perfect
We don't take time to celebrate our accomplishments
We constantly make ourselves wrong

When we are looking to draw in love and relationship into our lives, we are called to start seeing clearly the way in which we are treating ourselves.

I clearly remember when I first started to see that everything I thought men were doing to me, for example: abandoning me, rejecting me, not valuing me, not seeing me etc, I was in fact doing to myself. It was being reflected back to me by men all around me. In my commitment and intention for love, I had to take a radical new stand for myself, that I would absolutely show up for myself, knew that if I wanted to create the type of relationship and connection that I was yearning for, I would need to become deeply connection to myself. Enough was enough - I was no longer willing to negate or dismiss my own feelings or needs. I started to become deeply interested and curious about all of the ways in which I was currently doing this. I became deeply engaged in loving myself, giving to myself, seeing myself, listening to my own needs and desires. I started to make new choices and take new actions that were in alignment with what I was seeing and my commitment to transforming my experience of love. I was taking a radical stand for myself.

When we change the relationship we have with ourselves, our whole external world changes accordingly.

This is truly miraculous. I remember when I first discovered this truth. Having been deeply in the process of giving to and nurturing myself, I began to put myself into the dating world again, only now I was different. I had a real sense of my own value and what I wanted to create in a relationship. I was able to express my needs and desires, what I needed in relationship and what I had to bring to a relationship. I became wholly visible. I noticed that I was attracting a very different kind of man: men who really saw me, who like me, were genuinely interested in having a relationship with me. I attracted men who were "lit up" by me, who couldn't wait to get to know me. My whole experience of love and relationship was transformed and it wasn't too long before I met the love of my life and the man with whom I would spend my life.

How can we start to change our relationship with ourselves?

It begins with awareness - start to notice all of the ways in which you dismiss your own needs
Without blaming or shaming yourself, ask yourself: "In what ways to I beat myself up and criticize myself?"
Take a radical new stand for yourself, your happiness and well being by showing up for yourself no matter what
Start telling yourself how beautiful and valuable you are
Become available and committed to yourself
Take the time to celebrate your achievements
Spend time doing things you love and enjoy
Have play time
Learn to say "no"
Set new boundaries and limits where appropriate
Start to catch yourself when you judge or criticize yourself, take a step back and ask "What would love do in this situation?"

And now I would like to invite you to receive Free Instant Access to the Inspiring and Love-Transforming "Magnetizing Love" Gift Pack and receive a Free "Release Your Obstacles to Love and Become Irresistibly Magnetic to Your Soul Mate" Coaching Session with Julie-Anne Shapiro, UK's Love Facilitator at http://MagnetizingLove.com/

Can a woman tame a womanizer? Fat chance. What is a womanizer? He's a man who has love affairs with women and will not marry or commit to a relationship. Of course it's not 100% impossible to tame him, but do you really want to expend time and energy on a gamble? Let us consider a couple points about the womanizer.

He generally emits strong sexual attraction. There's just an irresistible animal appeal about him that draw women to him like flies to honey. He completely mesmerizes them with his charm. At first, he is very attentive; even spoiling her with candlelight dinner, beautiful flowers, and gifts thrown in that make him even more desirable.

He is generally a smooth talker. He has learned to say what women want to hear and takes full advantage of her gullibility to believe his every word. He calls often. And text messages more.

He is usually good looking, but not always. His appeal comes from that indescribable "it" factor. And his incredibly strong sense of self confidence.

He often uses "good sex" as leverage to control. She becomes so enamored of him it's as if she is under his spell. Combining all the above, she is convinced he loves her, and in her mind it's just a matter of time before he proposes.

But he doesn't.

After a few months, she notices he doesn't call as often. He's been seen with other women. He cancels dates. When she complains, he makes her feel guilty for asking. When she tries to pin him down, he explodes and let's her know he's in charge and if she doesn't like it to leave.

But she doesn't budge because by now, she's head over heels in love with him...and he knows it.

Therefore to keep her, he doesn't have to promise her anything. He doesn't have to be monogamous. He doesn't have to make a commitment. He calls the shots because he knows she's hooked on him, and he uses this knowledge for his own selfish ends. He's a user.

Does he consciously use her? Sometimes yes. Sometimes no. It doesn't matter. Either way she loses.

How does a woman break free from the emotional dominance of a womanizer?

First, recognize that this man is a player. That's not hard to figure out. Problem is some women fool themselves into believing that somehow she is different. That she can tame him. That he will be faithful to her, ignoring the unfaithfulness he has shown to other women.

Next ask these questions: When she pleads for his attention, does he offer words of consolation? Does he use words of reassurance to ease her mind? Follow up questions would be: Is this how the love of my life would respond to me? Is this man serious about committing to me or does he simply want to play? Wouldn't I be better off spending time dating a man ready for marriage?

In summary the answer to the question posted: Can a womanizer be tamed?...is I guess if he decides he wants to, he can, but that's a BIG gamble.

My name is Donna Patterson. At http://www.readyformarriagedating.com, I teach women the limits of Uncommitted love and sex to instead discover the six critical decisions necessary to establish Committed Love first, leading to genuine love and a husband as best friend in marriage based on a six-step transitions process. Also, Download 6 FREE Sure-Fire Dating Tips. Click here: http://www.readyformarriagedating.com

I heard a great quote the other day. Have you ever heard a quote that was so good that you just had to write it down. This was one of those kind of quotes. Let me share it with you. They said "The problem with relationships are that people are so busy falling in love that they forget to fall in like." That is so powerful, for many years I did just that. In my current relationship I followed the correct path and fell in like first. I am so much happier and you can be too, here is how.

If you are just meeting a potential new love, get to know them. There is plenty of time to be wrapped up in the passion of love. Befriend them first and get to actually know them as a person. A dear older friend of mine who has been married over forty years told me recently, "when you get older you are more friends than anything else, so make sure you like hanging out with her!"

If you have been dating romantically for a while already take time to get to know her. Make a serious effort to learn about what she likes and dislikes. Become a student of him or her. Do you enjoy similar things or are you at least complimentary in your tastes? If he is just gorgeous, but boring to hang out with do you really want to build a life on that? Of course not! Part of the love equation has to look forward to the future when you are "more friends than anything else."

Are you married to them? Well it is a little late to be getting to know their likes and dislikes hopefully you have already done this before you got married. In the unfortunate case where you haven't then my advice for you is totally different. If you find that your tastes do not merge then one or both of you need to work on changing the things you like to mix with your partner. If you want things to last forever figure out some things that she enjoys and learn to like them too. (I am not married, but after many years if hating football I learned to enjoy it because my girlfriend loves it, so don't say it cannot be done.)

Do you like your partner? Do you even know them enough to like them? In the building of solid love, like is a main ingredient. Get to know them, become a student of them, or learn to like something that they love in order to mix well with them.

Relationships can be rocky and romance not always a piece of cake. Visit Like To Love [http://moreromance.info] and receive a free video on spicing up your romance absolutely free. Normally valued at $97, you get it just for showing up!

Are you ready for a loving, committed relationship with the right guy? Are you confused by the signals your guy sends? Because of past relationships, are you hesitant to trust your feelings? Do you wonder if a committed relationship is in your future? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you can have a loving, committed, relationship and you can know if he is ready.

A loving, committed, relationship is every girl's desire; however, confusing signals, hurts from past relationships, or not trusting your feelings, can contribute to wondering if the guy you are dating is sincerely ready for a relationship. Following are ways to know he is ready for a loving, committed relationship.

Intimate details: No, not does he share with the guy's things he shouldn't, I mean, does he share his personal thoughts and feelings with you? A guy who is ready for a long term relationship will open up and share his thoughts, goals, and experiences. It may not be on the first date, but over time you will begin to see what he is all about. Guys who are in it for "fun" will not be as willing to share their feelings.

Long range plans: A guy who is interested in a relationship will not only plan, but commit to long terms engagements. It may be dinner with friends coming to town for a visit, a social event several months away, or meeting someone at the beach for a weekend get-a-way. If he is seeking long term, he will not be afraid to commit weeks, or even months in advance.

Meet the family: This is a huge test for a relationship. Meeting parents and family is stressful. A guy who is ready for a relationship will do a couple of things. First, he will put his best foot forward for the occasion. Not necessarily coat and tie, but nice slacks and shirt, he will dress to impress. Second, he will take time to ask questions about your family. Are there topics he should avoid, or does your family have certain beliefs he needs to respect. He will do everything he can to make the evening enjoyable for you, your family, and lastly himself.

These are just a few ways to know a guy is ready for long term. When he is ready, he will discuss his life with you and make you feel a part of it. He will make long term plans that include you and he will be willing to meet family and friends. You can have a loving, committed, relationship, and you can know if he is ready.

To learn more, click Fall in Love and learn Love Mistakes that 99% of women make without knowing.

This article is contributed by Tina Jones from the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website.

When it comes to women and relationships, in the beginning, most men think they want to "Have their cake, and eat it too".

No need to explain what I mean by this, because I'm sure you intuitively get what I'm talking about, and you may have experienced this with a man.

But... This is not the case with every single man that a woman meets.

Every once in awhile, a man will meet a woman and know very quickly - without a doubt - that he wants to be with her and only her. I'm talking about the situation where a man knows he wants to be with one woman because it feels right on a deep emotional level.

When this happens, the man will usually be the one to push for a long-term commitment.

And you won't have to do anything but keep being the great partner that you are, and help him with the things he wants to do, to keep you both close and together.

Sometimes though for some strange reason, the guys you don't want seem to always be pursuing you for more.

Maybe this has happened to you before... But you don't exactly know how or why it happened... Or more importantly, how to repeat it with a guy you really want...

Strange how that works, isn't it?

Your goal is getting a guy that you want, to want to be more and more committed with you!

A woman that truly captures a man's heart will:

Make a man feel, through experience, that he's better off being with you rather than being single, spending most of his time with his friends, or "sleeping around".

And...

Show a man, on a physical and emotional level, that he's better off being with you rather than any other woman he could possibly meet.

Probably not your favorite thing to hear, but most men are "designed" by nature to be able to sleep with a lot of women. Men have a "drive" that's part of their long time role in nature.

Of course, this is not the way most women were designed...

In order for you to make a man feel that he is better off being with you rather than living the "single life" and going around and sleeping with a lot of women... Or focusing obsessively on his career. You need to remind him of the benefits that a deep, connected, loving relationship brings... And unlock those hidden feelings inside of him.

Fortunately it's easy to do - especially when he already has feelings of attraction for you. You can turn those feelings of attraction into feelings of intimacy and passion.

So few women know how to help a man get in touch with this side of himself - the part of himself that all men secretly long to share - when you are the one that helps him to do it, he will automatically start experiencing a deep connection with you and want to keep it alive and growing.

This is not something you can do just by talking about it. The key is to actually get him to experience those feelings when he's around you.

The reality here is that a guy will not willfully commit to you unless you flip this "switch". And no amount of pleading, begging, withholding, etc. Will work.

When you do flip this switch and trigger these thoughts... He will be the one asking you to commit... Every time.

If a relationship isn't growing, it's usually dying... And perhaps the most important thing you need to know is to continue to strengthen the bond between you and your man,... Keep that fire of intimacy burning forever.

Every one of us dreams of one day experiencing that "storybook" romance with that special person we are meant to share our lives with...

We think about how wonderful it will feel to finally be with that person... Look into their eyes... And know that we've found the love and connection we've been searching for.

For further, more in depth information and tips on this subject, please visit the link below...

[http://datinghelp101.info/]

I am sure you will agree that the information provided at the link above is very enlightening!

Thanks, Ken

Are you ready for a loving, committed relationship with the right guy? Are you confused by the signals your guy sends? Because of past relationships, are you hesitant to trust your feelings? Do you wonder if a committed relationship is in your future? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you can have a loving, committed, relationship and you can know if he is ready.

A loving, committed, relationship is every girl's desire; however, confusing signals, hurts from past relationships, or not trusting your feelings, can contribute to wondering if the guy you are dating is sincerely ready for a relationship. Following are ways to know he is ready for a loving, committed relationship.

Intimate details: No, not does he share with the guy's things he shouldn't, I mean, does he share his personal thoughts and feelings with you? A guy who is ready for a long term relationship will open up and share his thoughts, goals, and experiences. It may not be on the first date, but over time you will begin to see what he is all about. Guys who are in it for "fun" will not be as willing to share their feelings.

Long range plans: A guy who is interested in a relationship will not only plan, but commit to long terms engagements. It may be dinner with friends coming to town for a visit, a social event several months away, or meeting someone at the beach for a weekend get-a-way. If he is seeking long term, he will not be afraid to commit weeks, or even months in advance.

Meet the family: This is a huge test for a relationship. Meeting parents and family is stressful. A guy who is ready for a relationship will do a couple of things. First, he will put his best foot forward for the occasion. Not necessarily coat and tie, but nice slacks and shirt, he will dress to impress. Second, he will take time to ask questions about your family. Are there topics he should avoid, or does your family have certain beliefs he needs to respect. He will do everything he can to make the evening enjoyable for you, your family, and lastly himself.

These are just a few ways to know a guy is ready for long term. When he is ready, he will discuss his life with you and make you feel a part of it. He will make long term plans that include you and he will be willing to meet family and friends. You can have a loving, committed, relationship, and you can know if he is ready.

To learn more, click Fall in Love and learn Love Mistakes that 99% of women make without knowing.

This article is contributed by Tina Jones from the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website.